Shit. Lost it. We always lose it. Got so many great ideas until We grasp the pen. It’s madness. But We gotta do this, it’s about doing this. It’s always about doing it, not what comes out of it, not what it represents, but the act of creating. It’s a wonderful thing, creation. It’s something from within that always comes bursting out. It never starts that way, though a minute or two into it and the soul’s blazing. It really heats up and becomes its own thing, its own version, different from everything else and indifferent to every external factor.
We think one should understand, grasp the potential of creation, whatever the medium might be. Painting, writing, music, videography, really whatever. It doesn’t matter, as long as it’s something you can reflect on. It might not be for the world to see, but one should not fear that the world might come across your pieces one day. Exactly because the world created you and those bits represent that creation, the deepest parts of your madness.
Leveling Up
Well, most people would consider this madness to be something negative, but in Our mind it always was what got Us through the pain, the hurt, the daunting tasks ahead of Us. And ignoring this madness does not make it grow, it might even make it fade. But We found a way to level up this tool to overcome adversity and rise from certain situations that would have most minds shrivel into a ball and wither. It’s simple, step by step, push by push, take something that pushes your boundaries both physical and mental, do it, take a breather, let everything sink, and find something that’s a little harder, repeat that process and before you know it you’re hiking through ankle deep snow without food or water and you know you’ll make it.
There’s a limit, always remember there’s an edge for everyone, but don’t be afraid to get close to that edge and expand its horizon. Everytime you push that edge a little further you expand the knowledge or at least the capacity for knowledge of yourself. But that edge is hard to find at first, so do not worry about reaching it, a lot of work is necessary, a lot of pursuits for that cutting stone.
All Deaths are Violent
Why this. Guess because you always say you’ve never wanted a risky life, just the regular living, the comfortable days and the easy flow with some ups and downs along the way. But, honestly, there’s something about that flatline, because when that shit’s happening on a monitor, doctors and nurses are rushing about the place doing everything in their knowledge to bring back those constant ups and downs. Well, We hear it a lot, people saying shit coming down to the point of just wanting that flatline, the easy level route, not the hills and valleys, rivers rocking the boat. Everybody seems to yearn for the calm stream, though We often ponder whether it’s the truth or not. Maybe everybody’s just afraid of running into themselves along the path of exploration thread of uncovering. And We are talking about the real self, not some higher self bullshit, just the self that reveals who you truly are. It’s not a permanent thing, it’s not set in stone, not engraved in glass. There’s room for change, for growth, if you will. It’s never pleasant though, because when we wish to introduce a new self the old one has to die, and every death is a violent one, just as every birth is a painful one. When oxygen first hits the lungs it burns, it stings, just as the realization of the new self will leave you with an understanding that this version will not necessarily improve your life. It will only do so if you shape it to do so, it will only accomplish that which you force it to attain. If you don’t, then it will relapse into the habits that once made up the old self and recreate that being all over again.
All that We’ve learned right here and right now is that you’ll always be annihilating what once was and shaping what can be. Is it a pleasant life, a happy life. Can’t say, haven’t lived it long enough. But it is a full life, a busy life. So is yours, it is exactly the same thing except for one, purpose. And We will not claim you don’t have purpose or gain purpose from the life you are living, but something tells Us you will one day wake up and feel empty, mistreated, and robbed of freedom. Freedom of the mind. As you never made the time to explore what slumbers withing that spirit which built you up into the being you are today. This may be a little harsh, We could be speaking out of place, saying shit that does not matter, to you or in general, but always remember that We once were in a similar position, with a similar decision to make, though We chose something entirely different. We haven’t once come to the point where We regret that decision, that choice of direction. It showed Us a world and a manner of looking at things not many come across in their entire life. And there’s been many days, and many days to come where all these people are right, where it still didn’t work out and and We’re still not there yet, but one day all the pieces will fit together and another part of Our life can begin. Do We know what that is? We might never. But We don’t even know what this is. So, fuck it. Let’s keep after it. Let’s grind it out and continue Our pursuit of the madness, although everyone’s always gonna tell Us it’s stupid and a waste of time. Existing every day and not living the pursuit to Us seems a waste of time. But everyone’s granted their opinion.