Time, something precious, is it not? Money, fancy cars, big houses, beach vacations. But nothing trumps the value of time. Though it seems like nobody understands, realizes. Well, when they’re trying to get home or get somewhere they’d almost run you over with their rolling metal beasts, but as soon as they get to that couch or TV screen, sipping their beer or wine, creating every excuse to justify their behavior, to rationalize the “special” treatment. Well, they deserved it, didn’t they, after a hard day’s work. And all of a sudden that ‘oh so valuable’ time isn’t that important. It can waste away just the same as the human squandering it.
Weird thing, right. They would kill each other out there just to get home as fast as possible, but once they get there it’s only to let those hours seep away until the time for sleep arrives. Not everyone’s like this, of course, there’s many of the nine to fivers that do something after their job, but then again, what is it exactly? Gym, music school, evening school, art class. Just a few of the many. Or, is it the bar, the movies, hang out with the boys, whatever. One opens up your brain and provides growth, the other one destroys brain cells and promotes laziness. You decide, though think we all know the answer.
Rebuilding Ruins
Well, We ain’t gonna claim We’re better, but We’re trying to better. Step by step. It’s not easy, gotta admit that. Hey, We were what many still are today. Slaves to comfort. But We don’t want any of that any longer. Even if We’re comfortable it’s not anything close to comfort. The constant pain makes sure of that. We’re not advertising this living though. Don’t do that. But do something, before it’s too late. And actually, this is from Our own point of view, it’s already too late. We fucked up long ago, and to rebuild a life in ruins is a task that takes a bunch of time, and a whole bunch of courage. Because the first thing that has to happen is the reflection. A long good look at the self, and that’s not pleasant, and it ain’t gonna happen while the TV is on, music playing, drowning in substance, or blabbing noise of other lost souls.
One Chaotic Mess
Are you on a path for improvement? Would love to see you try, such a beautiful person, a strange woman. Many people pressed us, many linked us, but it wasn’t that way. And when We say beautiful woman We’re referring to what’s on the inside. And what’s on the inside isn’t perfect but that’s just perfect. But We know, We understand, you just as anyone else are not after it the way you should. We get it, it’s painful, it’s a tedious never ending task of self investigation. It’s not about improvement nor becoming a better version of yourself. Just finding out and accepting what is found.
Guess most people wouldn’t be able to process the information uncovered, but that’s normal at first. It was the same for Us. It always is, logically in a sense as everything is packed together and will unload all at once. But the big picture and the tiniest bits always elude the mind at first. It’s a chaotic mess of all that’s present in there. The hurt, the denial, the misconception, the laughter, the hatred, the judgement, all bundled and roaming free among the memories provided by life. It’s bound to get emotional, not in the crying or yelling type of way. More in the pulling off your own skin from your body. That’s how it’s gonna start.
We used a lot of pain to counteract that sensation. A ton of physical pain to work against the spiritual one. It’s not so much emotional pain, although it’s part of that spiritual pain. There’s no end to it though. All that shit, all that bullshit done to you over the years won’t ever fade. It cannot, because it’s a part of you, but there’s ways to live with it. For Us it became daily physical annihilation. It’s not the same for everybody. But it comes down to consecutive tediousness, constant confrontation with a singular focus, something on your mind when you rise, eat, drink, sleep, fuck, dream, take a fucking shit. That’s just it. Repetitive behavior that sucks will drag out every bit of trouble lodged in the brain. Well, it takes some time.
Need for Silence
There’s definitely a lot in there, especially at our age, right. You’ve been through a whole lot, just like Us, so there must be a ton of stress in there, swirling around. Sometimes you fall upon those memories, don’t you now and then? We know you do, just like Us, just like everyone else. Wonder how most people handle them, wonder how you get on with it. Are you taking care of them, or do you stuff them inside and ignore the value they hold.
We believe that there’s a certain message hidden within these remembrances, a lesson to learn about yourself, but you’ve gotta face the truth that’s revealed about your role in those past beings. The way you held yourself, acted, behavior both physical and emotional. What you said, what you did, the way you opened or closed yourself to the situation. There’s a lot to consider when going through these memories, though one thing is certain, to unravel the mysteries inside that brain of yours there’s need for silence. An undisturbed peace of surroundings, where one can sit and contemplate what has been revealed. That’s one way and maybe the only way.
Well, pretty little lady, hope you find the will to face your demons. It’s a tough journey and if it ever gets hard, just know you’re on your own in this, but that’s the prize to the puzzle.